mask of alex #5 2005 charcoal and pastel on paper 18x24.  

sunday morning

so here it is sunday already. i have made these two images to go on the back of my cards i might put them on the back of t shirts. let me know what you think.
tomorrow i will be headed down to salt lake and am staying until wed or thursday and so i don't know if i will post or not. but i will be sure to let you know how things went. i am a little excited and a little nervous. and it will be nice to get out of my apt. and into a different mindset. it will be like a mini vacation and it will be nice to see dave again.

Mask # 6 (you name it ) charcoal and pastel on paper. 18x24 2005 

mask of alex #4 2005 charcoal and pastel on paper. 18x24 

Sorrow's Sweet Sigh

This drawing won first prize last year at the peach days competition at the brigham city museum. I now have it available at zazzle in card, print, and shirt. The original is for sale $1200. includes framing and shipping.

up again already

well here it is 4:45 and i am up and getting ready for an other day of work. sleeping is so difficult for me at times. sometimes i just get tired of the dreams. other times i love them.i made a direct link to my wishlist of art supplies from dickblick.com and have been updating my wishlist. thanks to win and dar for the gift cert. it came in handy i bought some canvas, bristol, and a set of conte crayons. thanks much for the support.

Mask of Sore 2005 acrylic paint and oil pastel on cardboard. 18x24 

CARDS

cards are now available in my zazzle gallery if you order 10 or more of the same one you get a bulk discount. they are all blank inside. if you want one specially made with something printed on the inside just let me know and i will set it up for you. check it out click on my products link

more stuff on zazzle

i have added a few more items to my gallery of products at zazzle, and will probably add a few more before the day is over.

exhaust

i was so exhausted and bored yesterday that i went to bed at 6pm. i had this dream that my parents had a pet chimp named bupa. it was truly bizarre and his fur had an argyle pattern. today is my 5th day in a row out of bed. i am not used to being up. i like the comfort of the bed so much. it is so safe there i don't have to think or maybe it is i think too much. anyway i have started my day and am spending more time working on my zazzle products. it is keeping me busy and giving me something to be excited about.

mask of alex #2 2005 charcoal and pastel on paper. 18x24 

Mask of Alex #1 2005 charcoal and pastel on paper 18x24 

taking a break

i am taking a break from working online to work on some charcoals. might as well i am going to clean all of the charcoal footprints off the carpet sometime this weekend. might as well get it messy before i clean it rather then messy after.

frustration and anxiety

so i smoked yesterday 1st time in 10 days and it has left me feeling very anxious. and with my dial up connection it is a frustration effort trying to get my high quality images uploaded to zazzle. it sucks. and i am on the breaking point. thank god for tranks. some of the older products i wasn't able to delete so i just re-did them and put high quality image in the title so if you want the best pick the one with high quality image that is only if there are duplicates to the product if there are not duplicates then it is already a high quality image.

my zazzle

so all of the hours i put in putting stuff on zazzle now i have decided to redo it all so i have better quality pics for them to work on. this will keep me busy all day i imagine.

my products

i have a good selection of prints and shirts now and will be working more on it today. if there is one of my images that you want on a shirt or print let me know and i will set it up for you. just click the link to my products and buy. it is affordable

my new merchandise

so michelle found this sight www.zazzle.com that will put your images on shirts and prints and cards. this is very exciting. you should check it out and buy something. i only have a couple now but i am going to be working on it for the rest of the night. i have had a really good day today therapy and all. and it has been a week since i smoked. COLD TURKEY. so check out the link it is the top link and it will take you right to my stuff. this would be a great way for you to get my art in an affordable form.

Mask # 7 acrylic paint and oil pastel on paper. 18x24 2005.  

heat and depression..

i have not wanted to move and spent saturday and much of sunday just laying in bed and sleeping. i finally got up today. and cleaned my apt. it was a mess. it tends to turn into chaos when i am working and working on the vodka. it has been 7 days since i have had a cig. i really hope that when i get my money again i won't buy them because i simply can't afford them and run out of them and then i have to suffer with out them for a few days and today has been bad. but i really want to quit.

therapy

so i had to get my ass out of bed today at 6 so i could make it into therapy by eight. i didn't want to get up i wanted to stay in bed all day. which is becoming a more and more frequent occurance. but i got my ass up shat my shit and made the long walk into to visit. and we spent much of the time talking about going down to salt lake and my presentation to john's class. it is a great fear of mine since i have social phobia and social situations when i am not drunk can bring on a panic attack. and because basically i flunked out of school cause i couldn't handle the pressure of going there and working and having everyone look at my stuff. so i will be going in armed with tranks and find a way to make it work. cause my teacher wouldn't have invited me if he wasnt impressed with my stuff.

mask # 5 ( you name it ) paint and oil pastel on paper 18x24 2005 

untitled #9 2004  

my darkest days 18x24 charcoal and pastel on paper 2004 

untitled # 7 charcoal and pastel on paper 18x24 2004  

my quest!!!

so john erickson from the u of u has responded to the work i emailed him and has asked me to come down and present my portfolio to his class. i have been through mixed emotions since thursday first being very flattered and excited that i have achieved something then very insecure and nervous then confident then afraid. it just goes on and on. so i have been looking through my work from the last two years to pick out pieces to present. i am going down on august 2nd which will require great discipline on my part. for i must be sober in order to survive this. but i think i can do it and gain the mental health strength to do it.

and in going through my stuff from last year i found three pieces that i had pretty much discarded but now really like i will be posting them today.

buy now

the special gift certificate option only lasts until the end of august and then the $500 deal only lasts until the end of the year then i will be working on new stuff and my prices go up for the older ones. so take a minute to browse and shop and buy. (and comment)

jason (as i remember) in the light of shadow. 18x24 pastel and charcoal on paper 2005 

again this is my winner 

mask of jason # 1....charcoal and pastel on paper 18x 24 2005 $1200. 

i see what i see

all of these this year have come just right out of my head.

mask of ? (you name it) 18x24 charcoal and pastel on paper 2005 

mask of ? you name it. 18x24 charcoal and pastel on paper 2005 

brother of shadow # 11 ( you name it ) 18x24 charcoal and nupastel on paper 2005 

my teacher and idol

i sent some samples of my work to my old teacher and protege at the u of u but still no response. am i out of the loop or am i really doing something spectacular. you answer.

brother of shadow #10 ( you name it ) 18x24 charcoal and pastel on paper. it is so good to get back into charcoal it is my dark home.  

the color office is closed i have hung my apron.  

brother of flame # 11 ( you name it ) 18x24 acrylic and oil pastels on papter. not my best work but i was working just to keep busy and work through some emotions 

most items are for sale

some items are spoken for but most of them i am making a deal priced at $500 unframed i am willing to give them up for a $100 gift certificate to dickblick.com and a $100 gift certificate to projekt.com that is less than half price please i beg you support the arts.

well it is official

i am now out of acrylic paint. so i guess is back to charcoal again at least for the time being. i asked my mom to buy me some and she said she would but that may take a while. last time i saw her she made some comments about me taking all the time and not giving. what she doesn't know is that i have given alot of art away in my lifetime and all those years of sending postcards just to brighten your day. haven't i given alot. i must thank rory for the fine cds and michelle for keeping me in supplies again.

brother of shadow # 9 (you name it) 18x24 acrylic and oil pastels on paper 2005